What is “Breadcrumbing”?
As you were about to throw in the towel and put your energy elsewhere, they dropped a new trail of breadcrumbs after leaving you in the dark for quite some time. The breadcrumbs fill you up with just enough attention, time, energy, and affection to keep your hopes up – until the trail suddenly stops again.
Breadcrumbing is a newly introduced term in dating, and it differs from the already familiar terms ghosting, zombieing and benching – it basically describes a way of leading someone on in the dating world.
Someone who leaves breadcrumbs leads you on by dropping small hints of interest here and there. They occur on an irregular basis, such as a random phone call, a date, an occasional message or interactions on social media.
So, what are some of the signs you’re being breadcrumbed?
People who breadcrumb want to keep you interested even if they have no plans to build a relationship with you. They may leave you on read for several weeks, or even months, before suddenly messaging you again.
Usually, their go-to way of breadcrumbing is to send memes and videos.
Or maybe they give you subtle hints that they still want to connect with you by liking your Instagram stories or posts – all while still leaving your last message on “seen”.
And they never follow through on the plans of meeting up either.
“Breadcrumbers” aren’t fully willing to dismiss the possibility of meeting you again – and the only reason they might step up their efforts by maintaining contact and interest is if you stop responding or signal that you’re losing interest in them.
People who breadcrumb want to keep you interested even if they have no plans to build a relationship with you. They may leave you on read for several weeks, or even months, before suddenly messaging you again.
Usually, their go-to way of breadcrumbing is to send memes and videos.
Or maybe they give you subtle hints that they still want to connect with you by liking your Instagram stories or posts – all while still leaving your last message on “seen”.
And they never follow through on the plans of meeting up either.
“Breadcrumbers” aren’t fully willing to dismiss the possibility of meeting you again – and the only reason they might step up their efforts by maintaining contact and interest is if you stop responding or signal that you’re losing interest in them.
Let’s delve into other reasons why people breadcrumb…
It is their “fun” little game of playing with your feelings while giving you false hope there is relationship potential there.
Breadcrumbing is not only a complete waste of your time, but it can also leave you confused and upset – and it can be pretty fucking painful.
You’re swooning over someone who is constantly withholding, putting your relationship on edge and leaving you wondering if it’ll ever truly bloom into anything meaningful – perhaps commitment isn’t their cup of tea?
Of course, this is not something they will communicate to you…
Perhaps the person breadcrumbing you is an ex who is refusing to say goodbye? Or someone who is already in a relationship but is keeping the connection alive in case their current relationship doesn’t work out *cough* micro-cheating *cough*.
But there are also people who struggle with forming genuine meaningful connections or keeping healthy relationships; they leave enough breadcrumbs so that they always have someone to talk to or lean on, expecting that it will ease their loneliness.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to get to know a lot of people in order to find the best match. That being said, not being honest about your goals or relationship status may cause the person being breadcrumbed a lot of heartache or just simply waste their time.
At the end of the day, no one wants to feel like a second choice or get led on.