Despite how romantic it may sound, love at first sight is not always the case, but it doesn’t make the journey of a slow burn romance any less romantic.
The relationship journey of Issy IIowarch, 20, and James White, 20, is the epitome of a slow burn relationship – A love that grows beyond the initial spark of attraction and requires time and attention.
The two were strangers until they coincidentally relocated to Sheffield and found themselves sharing university accommodation – and it didn’t take long for their initial acquaintance to blossom into a strong friendship.
“I thought he was shy (at first) and I liked when he started to gain more confidence around us” says Issy when I ask what her first impression of James was.
And they do say opposites attract;
“My first impression of her was that she was confident and funny.
“I was more socially awkward and felt she was more confident meeting new people.” says James.
But despite them becoming close fairly quickly in first year and gradually spending more time together in their friendship group as well as just them two, there was no romance involved.
However, Issy admits that she did like him back in first year but she “didn’t want a relationship so I didn’t tell him.”
“(I’m) pretty sure he was the same, we both liked each other at different times.”
“All of our friends have been making jokes about us liking each other since first year so it wasn’t a surprise to anyone when we finally got together.”
However, James claims it was him who fell first. He goes on to say that during the friendship they slowly fell for each other and sometimes at different times because the “emotions went up and down”.
“We flirted throughout the friendship, along with emotions going up and down throughout the 2 and ½ years before we got together.
“Although the situation was sometimes frustrating, having emotions and thinking it would not go any further has worked out well.
“There wasn’t a linear progression.” says James.
Issy and James managed to maintain the close friendship during the 3 years they have known each other and a large proportion of their relationship remained the same after becoming a couple.
“Both used to be somewhat immature in terms of relationships and I personally do not believe the relationship would have lasted if we got together before we actually did, when we were both ready.” says James.
Issy agrees and admits she would not have done anything differently if she could.
“I think we were both more immature about relationships in the past.
“If we got together any sooner it wouldn’t have lasted.”
However, going from being friends to lovers is not an easy task. And they both admit they were worried how their dynamic would change and potentially ruin the friendship. And despite every situation being different, James and Issy emphasises on the importance of talking to each other about feelings without ruining the friendship.
“I was scared about how long it would take me to stop seeing him as my best friend. This didn’t really end up being a problem though and the transition was fairly smooth.” says Issy.
For people who might find themselves in similar situations, Issy says “there is no need to rush.
“It’s best to have a conversation with each other and be completely honest. Wait till you’re both ready.”